Most newspapers promptly print
corrections in their next issue. These corrections are
usually in a column called "Errata."
Fortunately for our readers, SandBagger
Mag-e-zine has never stooped to this cheap
journalistic practice.
"It's irritating to read an article
and then find a bunch of corrections in the next issue—you
never know when you're finished reading," said SandBagger
attorney Tim South.
Errors are part of the newspaper
game. In fact, SandBagger Mag-e-zine prides
itself on making them. But we never 
print corrections. Readers
hate being told the news they read yesterday didn't really
happen. Besides, it's hard enough to understand our
articles the first time without sorting through a bunch of
corrections in the next issue. That's why,
at SandBagger Mag-e-zine, we don't waste time
correcting errors. We're too busy making new ones.
Besides, corrections would mean we'd actually have to read
this stuff.
But for readers like South, The
SandBagger Institute for Advanced Human Research and
Bowling Team has developed new proprietary media
technology called,
"Pre-Errata."
Pre-Errata allows
corrections to be printed in the same issue where mistakes
occur.
Not impressed? How about
this? Pre-Errata allows corrections to be
printed even before mistakes are
made.
A demonstration is in
order. Our next paragraph includes corrections for
a following article which has not yet been
written:
Pre-Errata: At line 7, "did not,"
should be replaced with "did." At line 11, "Barry
Morrill," should be replaced with "an unidentified
individual." At line 19, "said," should be replaced with
. . . well . . . that one is right. It
should say "said." Also at line 19, the period
should be a question mark.
[Editor's Note:
Due to an unexpected typesetter's error, the errors
corrected above will not appear in the
following article after all.]
