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by Horace J. Digby
Our society is obsessed with
counseling. It's everywhere—marriage counseling, anger counseling,
depression counseling, are just a few. Depression counseling in
particular strikes me as odd. Say you are
depressed because a gang of thugs is after you.
Isn't it fundamentally wrong for some counselor to suggest that you
embrace the experience? After all, depressed people are usually
just the ones with the best grasp of the situation.
Feeling depressed over evils, like
international terrorism and prime-time television is a good thing.
Sure, some wealthy, gifted, talented people may not seem to have a reason
for depression, but they may just be worried about the rest of
us.
Depression is an appropriate response.
Realizing this made me feel better. I even started dwelling on
the good things in life, like the Yankees losing a World Series for a
change. Now I have less to worry about. For one thing, I don't
have to worry about depression anymore.
But my euphoria was short lived.
I began to wonder if it was wrong not to be depressed. So I
called my old friend Caufbaugh Twilley.
Twilley was quick to diagnose my
condition, "You're in denial, Horace my boy," he said. "It's
the worst case I've ever seen."
Figuring Twilley was just be stumping
for business, I told him, I was not in denial. But he explained that
denying I was in denial, proved I really was in denial. I couldn't
argue with that. Heck, I couldn't even understand it.
And what about those nagging feelings of comfort and
well-being? Were they a subconscious cry for help? Something told
me Twilley was right.
Knowing that depression is
normal is a positive step, Twilley explained, but
feeling good about knowing it, is back sliding.
"If depression is normal," Twilley
said, sketching it out on a napkin as he talked, "and you are not
depressed, then you are not normal." I couldn't argue with that
either. So I made an appointment.
I ruffled when Twilley told
me how much the counseling would cost, but he reminded me that anger
issues were extra, so I just wrote a check. Anger management would
have to wait until I got over feeling okay about not being
depressed.
By our third session I was feeling
pretty bad about having felt good about not being
depressed. Twilley asked how that made me feel. Without
thinking, I told him I felt good about it. We both
knew that meant I'd need more treatment.
I am making progress. Now that I
can admit I'm in denial, I'm no longer in denial about being in
denial.
Although, the thought of paying extra
for anger counseling still pisses me off.
-- Horace J. Digby Copyright © 2005, Lexington Film, LLC. All rights
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